Schools

Selectmen Mull Bullying: Some Parents, Media Share Blame

Blame to go around. Superintendent William McKersie said additional documentation requirements could slow down the report process. Tesei slammed local media for anonymous comments. An expert blamed media for publishing "How-To's" of suicide.


The topic at Thursday's Selectmen's meeting was bullying prevention, but the subtext was the recent suicide of Bart Palosz, who took his life on the first day of school. And, between the selectmen and guest speakers, no one was exempt from blame.

Ross Ellis, founder of Stomp Out Bullying offered advice to the Selectmen on tackling bullying in a town as large and diverse as Greenwich. 

"If only someone had paid attention to Bart's pain, judging from his Google page he had been planning his death. No kid should ever ever be planning their death," Ellis said.

Ellis pointed a finger at the media as responsible for some blame for suicides. "When (young people) hear the news, when the media talks about kids, how they committed suicide. If a kid is in a lot of pain...they're going to think 'That's a good idea. I can get rid of my bullying the same way...' They don't get that suicide is forever."

Ellis also blamed schools. "Schools are afraid of getting a reputation of having the school full of bullies," she said. "They are afraid of losing their funding. They are afraid of angry parents coming to school demanding that bullies be expelled, or worse, arrested." Ellis added. "We must introduce 'SEL,' social emotional learning, into schools' curriculum...to help kids recognize emotions, deal with feelings...develop sympathy and empathy."

Lastly, Ellis blamed parents who aren't aware of their children's use of the Internet. "Parents need to know what their kids know, and even more," she said. "The Internet is the Wild West Frontier. It's anonymous and dangerous."

McKersie said emphatically that that the schools did know Bart, though he was not in a position to speak about specific interactions. He said that the faculty at Greenwich High School are "feeling extra hurt knowing that this was a young man that we knew and that even though we knew Bart, he made this decision."

"Every one of our schools has a Safe Schools Committee," Mckersie said. "Social emotional learning is a required part of our goal setting reviewed by the board, looked at carefully...We have plans and systems. We even have cards that our schools carry around for our five codes on conduct: 'Be here. Be safe. Be honest. Care for self and others. Let go and move on.' We have to stress that, that much more."

McKersie listed ways in which the school district handles bullying. After listing mental health staff, school psychologists, social workers, guidance counselors in every building, a new Dean of Student Life position at GHS, and a School Resource Officer, he added that GHS has the most active Names Day Program in the state.

"We have Teen Talk at Western Middle School. We also for sure have a Zero Tolerance on Bullying," McKersie continued, adding, "In validated cases of bullying they will look to expulsion." He went on to say, "Staff who are not holding up to the Connecticut Code of Professional Conduct, in proven cases of that, the ultimate issue is termination."

On the theme of blame, First Selectman Peter Tesei, who began his remarks by sharing that his own daughter was bullied in her private preschool, railed against local media outlets for allowing anonymous  commenting.  

"I think our media locally has been irresponsible...when you provide a platform for adults to make anonymous comments...you fuel a behavior that is deemed acceptable. In a sick sort of way people get off on it because they get, 'Well, I can say what I want but I don't have to say who I am.' They say things that are inflammatory, inaccurate, and they are allowed to get away with it...I'm all for freedom of speech, but I think freedom of speech means you have to know who is saying what. Anonymity is cowardice and I think bullies are cowards...I would call upon the local media outlets, Hearst and all the others...to cease that practice."   

St. Luke's School sophomore Alex Levy, a Stomp Out Bullying Teen Ambassador said he was bullied before he switched from public to private school. Like Palosz, Levy is 15 and just started his sophomore year of high school. 

"When are we as a community going to take this problem seriously?" Levy asked Greenwich's Selectmen. "Forty-nine states including Connecticut claim to have, quote, zero-tolerance policies about bullying, but standing here today, I look around and see a system where these policies are observed in the breach."

The Stomp Out Bullying website has useful information about bullying for young people and parents alike. 

Related Stories:
Vigil for Bart Palosz Draws Hundreds to GHS
Spurred by Tragedy, Grassroots GHS Connections Club Catches on Fast
Greenwich Schools: A Culture of Bullying?
What Kids Wish Their Parents Knew: Preventing Bullying
Greenwich High's Names Day, 12 Years Strong
Could Greenwich HS Student's Suicide Have Been Prevented?
Bartlomiej 'Bart' Palosz, 15; Greenwich High School Student


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