Family Meal Time

Do you remember your childhood family dinners? What were those times like? What made them good? Was it the food, the people, the conversation, the atmosphere? What "ingredients" do you bring to your family table today?

Our lives have become segmented. Family members are coming and going. Parents often arrive home late from work or meetings. Children may have multiple extracurricular activities in addition to home work. Family members can end up dispersed — text messaging, surfing the Internet, or playing video games. These attractions and distractions are increasing along with our rapidly paced lives.

Even when the family does eat together, the television might be on or someone is talking on the phone. These new normal interferences have eroded and undermined the positive intentions of our once sacred tradition. Disconnection has replaced the connection that comes from shared meals by creating the propensity for less togetherness and isolation. If we do not intentionally reclaim this time, the momentum of our lives will undoubtedly take over.

The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University (CASA) is mandated to find ways to keep kids from destructive behaviors, e.g. alcohol and substance abuse, truancy, vandalism. CASA found a correlation between the amount of family meals eaten together and kids' destructive behaviors than those who have no family meals together.  In addition, kids who had regular family meals were half as likely to be highly stressed as those who rarely had dinner together.

Here are some mealtime tips:

• Have meals at a regular time when possible
• Clear the table from its other functions for the meal
• Sit down together, facing one another, even if everyone cannot be present
• Make meal a "digital free" zone except for true emergencies
• Make the atmosphere and tone pleasant
• Foster time to talk and listen; no correcting, reprimands, or power struggles
• Model healthy eating by serving a variety of foods such as pasta, vegetables, salad, and fruits.

Having family dinners together is not only good for us, it makes us feel good too. Spending an hour around the dinner table just talking with your children is time well spent. Find your way to make family meals part of your family's ritual.